"Choose love, not fear": words to live by.
Photography: Malcolm Lightbody
Written by Yes Queen Founder, Sarah Fritz
Over two years ago I was at an event and drawn to a girl who I really wanted to meet. I have to admit proudly that my superhuman power is people – strangers, homeless, elevator encounters, new office starters, service staff, the other elderly folk at my grandmothers nursing home, the person walking on the same path as me – if I cross a person my inclination is to talk to them. I am genuinely interested in everyone! I want everyone to feel safe, happy and open in my presence. I want to gather people together to create change! It also backs my ethos which is “I am everyone and everything”. The more I can connect, the closer I am to oneness – the Holy Grail of life. As Janne Robinson says, speaking to strangers displays a heart with no fear.
New to the event space, this starry-eyed girl mentioned how she was so happy I had connected with her. As we went on chatting she asked if I had seen Jim Carey’s 2014 commencement speech “Choose Love, Not Fear” - I hadn’t but I watched it as soon as I got home and it’s been a regular part of my “tool-kit” ever since. Amongst many other things this now friend has taught me, this was the greatest lesson by far.
Jim Carey’s speech opens, “I am here to plant a seed that will inspire you to move forward in life with enthusiastic hearts and a clear sense of wholeness…. Life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you. How do I know this? I don’t, but I’m making sound, and that’s the important thing. That’s what I’m here to do. Sometimes, I think that’s one of the only things that is important. Just letting each other know we’re here, reminding each other that we are part of a larger self”.
After watching this I thought how easily these words could empower and lead a workplace; reminding each other daily we are there for one another and that we are a collective – everything we do at work is for the greater good. Having solo drive and ambition is critical – we are of course all setting our own killer goals, each at our own stage in business and developing unique skills – however what should come first and foremost is the collective. I understand we don’t align to everyone at work, I ask though, can we put aside the lens of what we are looking for in a friend and instead approach everyone at our work as a business partner. Ideally I would hope friendliness can be applied to all, however at the very, very least, can we be professional to everyone – no matter the level, the department, the age, or the sex. Let’s strive for oneness in work – this is choosing love over fear.
Some days it was incredibly hard to keep my love levels high over my corporate career – when all coffee orders were taken early morning but mine; when I was intentionally left out of business meetings; when in a small office everyone got a friendly hello but me, whispers and eye rolls shot at me whilst walking to the kitchen; when a colleague slammed their hands on the desk during a professional meeting; when I was so excited to report a business win and the person I had to report it to didn’t look at me once, completely looked away in front of peers – I could unfortunately write a book about mean girl culture at work.
What I can recognise on the other side is that all that behaviour came from fear. A person full of love does not operate like that. If faced with these adversities and you can still choose love – you win the game Yes Queens! I am sharing these details and this speech, as I want everyone to be FEARLESS – in and out of 9-5. Even if you are shaky, nervous, and anxious – let LOVE be your weapon – even if means covering your desk in black tourmaline crystals and wearing a rose quartz in your bra or pocket to meetings to find your voice (yeah I did!). Anything you need to operate from love and kindness, do it!
None of us, including me, are perfect. All we can do every day is try our fucking best. Be the best possible human, to yourself and others. That is step one.
Jim Carey has step 2. He asks, “How will you serve the world? What do people need that your talent can provide? That’s all you have to figure out. I can tell you from experience, the effect you have on others is the most valuable currency there is” (applause)!
There is no force equal to the power of love. In the epoch of female empowerment let’s rise above any negativity of the past and LEAD WITH LOVE.
What is your social currency worth? Be a multi-millionaire in good vibes only.